The day Zain left me in the hospital, broken and battered from the tragedy that had befallen us, my life has taken a turn I never imagined it would. This is life though, things happen unexpectedly and we adapt accordingly. That day I not only lost our unborn child but I also lost my husband, the only man I have ever truly loved. Zain was a strange person, I always knew that. He was different and that’s what had attracted me to him. Soon I realized that different doesn’t always mean good. He was abusive, not physically but emotionally. With him, I was never happy but without him, I am still not happy. I was depressed for a long time after that. Finally, I am fine now, at least I think that I am. I have gathered all the broken pieces of my heart and I have put them together, all on my own. I am in a good place and I don’t want to change anything that might disturb my newfound peace. Hania, however, seems to think that I need a man in my life to make it complete. I would never understand why people think that way. Is it really that hard to believe that I can be happy without a man?
“I am your friend,” she was saying, “I want what’s best for you.”
“And you think your brother is what’s best for me?” I am annoyed there is no doubt in that.
“Look, he likes you. I know he does. I also happen to know that you like him too. Why don’t you two go on one date? If it isn’t meant to be then that’s okay, I’ll stop pestering you, but at least give it a try. I know you are both perfect for each other.”
“Why do you think I need to date?”
“Have you ever wondered that maybe it’s not you but him I think that about?”
“I know you’re an independent woman. I understand your fears and your lack of interest in having a relationship. I also know that you don’t need anyone but yourself to be happy. You’re forgetting that I was there, with you, when your assh*le of a husband left you. I have seen your strength and that’s exactly why I think you’re perfect for my brother.”
“What do you mean? What’s wrong with your brother?”
“Nothing is wrong with him. I just worry about his lack of dating life. Do you know he has never dated anyone at all?”
That is indeed an interesting and disturbing fact. He looks like a model, he is rich, I’m sure girls would love to go out with him then why has he never dated? I don’t think even Hania knows or she would tell me. We have no secrets, the two of us.
“So, what do you say?”
“Ok, one date.”
“Don’t get too excited. It’s just one date.”
I must admit that I am very curious about him now. I want to know his story. I want to be the person who will heal his wounds if there are any. I will teach him to how to make his life worth living even without anyone to share it with. Suddenly I have a new purpose in life that might not be all bad.
My sister is such a pest. I’m not sure how she managed it but she has finally convinced us to go on a date. So, here we are. I must say that Sara is the most beautiful woman I have ever met. I do like her a lot. I just don’t like dating.
“I hear you’ve never dated before,” she said.
I am going to kill my sister for telling her that little bit of information, “I don’t usually find time for that kind of thing.”
“That’s just an excuse, don’t you think?” She smiled.
“I don’t know, there is no other reason.”
“You do like women though, I mean you aren’t gay, right? Not that anything wrong with it… but then this date would be pointless.” She was flustered.
“Don’t worry it’s nothing like that,” I laughed, “as I said there really is no reason. I just never have. I simply didn’t think about it.”
“What do you do when you get bored?”
“I don’t get bored. I read.”
“Ah! You’re the bookish type then.”
“Oh, nothing,” she continued, “I just love nerdy men.”
“What?” I chuckled, “Are you saying that you love me?”
“Huh? No! That’s not what I meant,” she added hastily, “you know it’s not.”
“Relax, I was just kidding.”
“So, do you think you will date me then?”
“Do you want me to?”
“I think I do.”
“Then I will.”
And that’s how our love story began. We both enjoy each other’s company and I am beginning to like her even more. I don’t think she is stuffy, now that I am getting to know her. I think she is cautious and that’s a good thing. I hope this thing works out well for both of us. I’d hate to cause my sister any pain. I know how close the two women are. Hurting Sara means hurting Hania and that’s the last thing I’d ever want to do. It didn’t even occur to me that she might end up hurting me.
Shan turned out to be one of the good guys. He is considerate, he is funny, he makes me laugh, and slowly he is breaking the ice around my heart. I’m beginning to fall in love with him. I thought I’d never love anyone again, yet he is someone so easy to love. There is something about him that puts my mind at ease. When I am with him, I don’t fear as much as I thought I would. I want to tell him everything and I want him to return the favor. He doesn’t though. I can feel his reluctance to share some private parts of his life with me or maybe he is just not the sharing kind of person.
“Are you alright?” I asked him.
“I am fine,” he smiled, “what do you want to watch?”
“Pride and Prejudice.”
“No, please, not again,” he groaned, “how many times have we watched that movie? I think this time I should choose.”
“I was kidding,” I said teasingly, “I just got this new movie that released a while ago and we’re watching that today.”
I open my eyes and see Shan looking at me oddly.
“You fell asleep.”
“Sorry about that.” But it didn’t explain why he was looking at me like that.
“You were talking in your sleep.”
“I just,” he looked for words, “Hmm, I didn’t know about your past.”
“Hania didn’t tell you?”
“No. I’m sorry that you went through something so painful.”
“It was a long time ago.” I gave him a warm smile. It is true I no longer feel the pain that used to come with these memories. Now, I am at peace with my life.
“You’re such an amazingly strong woman. I love that about you.”
“Are you saying you love me?” This time I teased him.
“Yeah, I think I am.”
His reply rendered me speechless. “It’s ok, I know you aren’t there yet. I am a patient man. I will wait for you.”
To be continued…
Read Part One here
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